The fragility of a smile

I love my niece, she is the first new born baby I ever held in my arms. I watched her grow for at least the first two weeks of her life, and then went back to boarding school. She grew up so fast that by the time I came back three months later; I remember asking my sister “is this the little baby?". Of course she laughed at me. I was 14 years old then probably not quite familiar with child development. One thing remains; I'm always mesmerized by how quickly babies grow. For me that’s one typical example of rapid change. Well, life has a tendency of bringing changes in alternation. Just imagine how quickly a clear blue sky turns into grey or how quickly love turns into hate, and how swiftly a heartwarming smile of a child turns into crying. So fragile are we that every beautiful moment feels like calm before the storm. As you enjoy the bliss of a new pleasure, you realize something ugly is bound to happen sooner or later. "Life is full of ups and downs" the saying goes. As I meditate upon the fragility of my happiness, how things have taken a wrong turn without warning in the past. How as soon as I thought everything was adding up, the confusion stepped in again. I begin to embrace the depth of my emptiness and the bitter truth that I'm forever filled simply to be emptied again. Honestly, as far as life goes, we must come to terms with the fact that we will never fully arrive for we are all continuously trying to figure things out. When the     moment of abundance comes, enjoy the things/people that make you happy without reservation. You never know how long you have. When all the streams dry up and it starts to feel like a desert, hold on to the memories and let them remind you that you are worth of all the good things that you once experienced and even more. Prepare your heart for the walk in the desert. In your season of abundance, fill your soul with God's truth about your life, take pictures, create a memory box and save money or invest you will thank yourself later. If you are to survive you need both psychological and physical nourishment which is a product of your preparation. When seasons change abruptly like they always do, you will have enough armor to go through each passing day with hope. There is no better remedy to prepare yourself for loss, It will always be painful, but a heart filled with hope can help you get back on your feet again sooner. Seasons will come and go, that's a necessity for growth. If you are passing through the dessert, have hope it shall come to pass.

Everyone deserves a Father

As I look back upon my life I imagine what it would be like to have my biological father still alive. For so many years I tried to remember just one moment with him even if it was just a glimpse of his face but to no avail. He passed on when I was three years old, so I guess that explains why I can't remember anything. I know a lot of people with a similar story. They forever imagine what it would be like to have a father. Unfortunately, we can never turn back the clock of time, so we must move forward. We are all consoled with the fact that we have a heavenly father in whom we place our trust in. God deliberately reviled himself as our father to show us how significant that relationship is. By allowing someone on earth to be our earthly father, he has created an opportunity for that individual to be all that he is in earthly form to the ones who call him father. God has made himself the greatest example of what fatherhood really requires. Our society has conditioned us to believe that being fatherless implies having no living father. Sadly, most families suffer the absence of a father not because he is dead or lives away from the family but he is simply not interested in the affairs of the home and the children's upbringing. With the increasing demand for financial stability in a country where most families lack even the most basic needs, men have shifted their focus to making ends meet to the point that there is little or no time left to develop a meaningful relationship with their children. For instance, a child is sent to the most expensive school in town but the father has never seen his son's school work, even once. I believe fatherhood is beyond being a provider. It is about showing our boys what it means to be a man and treating our little girls as the princesses that they are. It's about commitment and love towards the mother of your children, respect for family time and creation of beautiful childhood memories. Every child deserves beautiful childhood memories with their father. My dear friend once told me that the best gift a parent would ever give to their children is to watch them love their spouse. With fathers who refuse to come home early for family time and have numerous excuses on why they can't be there for their child, we are giving birth to a generation whose boys have no idea what being a father truly looks like let alone what being a man is all about. Our girls have never been privileged to be pampered and called beautiful by their father and have no basis to know what they are truly worth and will continuously settle for less than what they deserve. Growing up I had the privilege of having an earthly father, my uncle who made me feel like his own daughter, encouraged me, disciplined me, provided for me and made me feel special. He was a very kind and generous man; he took care of a lot of other people's children. It takes a strong man to take care of his children but it takes a stronger man to take care of another man's child, like his own no matter the circumstances the child lands into his life.

Beyond graduation day

A week ago I was privileged to be featured in a new television programme, called young achievers. I have had my own successes in life and even though I know I haven't reached my highest potential, I feel privileged to have been given an opportunity to share my experiences so far in hope to motivate and encourage other young people. Being a young, independent career women, is such a blessing. I'm so glad to know that I'm able to make a difference in my community and my country. I enjoy having my own home, taking care of those I love and making significant change in my line of work. To be a young achiever is a beautiful experience. I had just turned 23 when I got my first permanent job. So far, experience has taught me a Couple of truths about career achievement that nobody warns you about , I must firstly warn You that everyone has a unique experience .Trust me, the beginning of a fruitful career is not only about having the highest qualifications in the interview room but grace. God's purpose for your life will always prevail. If you think success is about your degree, you will be disappointed. When you are coming from university always know that your degree will take you to places but only wisdom will keep you on the right path .You need to work twice as much to keep a job than an older person performing the same duties.  You are young and people don't trust your capabilities yet. The most likely scenario is that you will change jobs after at least a year. At the beginning of your career, it is mostly about finding a job, any job until you realize you want more than just a pay check. It is very important to reflect on what path you would like to follow, most of our degrees are general, find a specific area that strikes your interest and is the best fit for your personality. Take time to listen to the experienced older colleagues, they have a lot of wisdom to offer, they might be less educated but experience is the best teacher, make friends with them. I personally have experienced stereotypes that I never got the chance to voice out. I'm tired of seeing young professionals being regarded as immature because they are not married yet nor have no children of their own. People are hesitant to give you responsibility outside the home. Some even get passed over a promotion at work simply because people doubt the maturity of single adults. I met a guy earlier on this year, who told me that people doubted his ability to lead the organization as the deputy director just because he was single. This particular stereotype is worse if you work for a religious organization. Honestly, the road doesn't get easier after you graduate; you are more responsible for your actions now than ever before.